I fold
Lying in bed last night, staring at the ceiling, and stressing about politics, my mind wandered off to contemplated The Challenge. It’s deeply flattering that so many people have come on board, and I doubt I’d have got this far without the support of those out there in Blogs-ville. It’s certainly fun to know that people are crossing their legs – it will surely make for an interesting day on Wednesday – and it amuses me to know that somehow I have ended up with the power to trigger numerous people to masturbate. But I started feeling uneasy about it. This was not what it was meant to be.
This was about me trying to make my sex life better with my Wife.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for y’all to play the game. And I’m not getting all serious and grumpy, far from it. And I’m deeply flattered by the support I’ve received. But this is not for me.
Cards thrown down. Chips in the pile. I fold.
Have fun people. If you want to carry on, that’s really cool. You’ll doubtless all have mind blowing orgasms at the end of the week, and I’m genuinely happy for you. But this challenge is not for me, and I’m getting out before I loose sight of why it started.
Peace.
August 26, 2012 at 1:48 pm
AM … love you dear, but you should lighten up every once in a while. Either way, you must do as you will … happy wanking.
August 26, 2012 at 6:48 pm
Don’t get me wrong, 40, I know it’s a bit of fun, and I’m cool with that. And I don’t have an issue with other people enjoying it. I was too … in some ways. But then I remembered why I was doing it, and the fun-ness just seemed to be all it had become for me – having fun with strangers – which meant I wan’t thinking about helping my marriage. Nothing more.
(I’m not sure I’m actually going to be able to explain it adequately.)
August 26, 2012 at 8:36 pm
Actually, that makes complete sense. It’s important to keep the original focus … staying in the game might have devalued it for you.
Got it, hon! Best of luck and best wishes.
August 26, 2012 at 3:24 pm
I thought it started so you might be more sensitive next time you have sex? Even abstaining a couple of days can help in that department.
August 26, 2012 at 6:49 pm
It did.
August 26, 2012 at 5:05 pm
I’m still in. I hate to burst your bubble AM, but I’m doing this for me first (to prove I can) and Hy second. On Friday Hy regained her power and said no to TN and that has made this worth it for me. Hey, thanks for the inspiration. Happy wanking. 🙂
August 26, 2012 at 6:51 pm
Glad to hear it.
I’ve not read Hy’s post on saying no in full yet, but I’m chuffed as hell for her.
Enjoy.
August 27, 2012 at 5:12 pm
Aw, True! So wonderful! I’m still in it! xx Hy
August 27, 2012 at 4:16 pm
Sooooooo, you masturbated? And for the record, I would NEVER ask that but thats what this posting was about – you holding back for the sake of the connection between you and your wife. I never lost sight of that. I was amazed at your steadfast resolve in the face of physical pain with a partner who had no idea of your devotion. You see, the “game” was never a game in my mind. People just travelled along with you so you weren’t alone… and in doing so, gained things of their own. More power to you , whatever you do. I still say you’re in love. : ) Jayne
August 27, 2012 at 5:12 pm
Right. I agree with you, Jayne. I have been using this to bolster my resolve to say NO, to take care of myself. I couldn’t do it alone, so “the game” bolstered me. (And it’s worked WONDERS – holy shit!).
AM, you do whatchoo gotta do, but any time you need some outside support to do what you have to do alone, let me know. I’m here for ya. xx Hy
August 27, 2012 at 7:50 pm
I’m glad you have got something positive from it.
And thank you for the offer of future support. That means a lot.
August 27, 2012 at 7:49 pm
I never said I had a wank.
But for me, it had become a bit of a game, and any commitment felt like it was to those other than my Wife. I had lost sight of what I was doing.
The fact that I decided to “fold” was in no way a reflection on others, and I very much appreciate their company.
August 27, 2012 at 8:06 pm
You are a very strong guy, AM.
August 27, 2012 at 10:02 pm
Oh AM, you really are a very strong guy. (I’m relieved that the game is off..I still want My Hy My Apple Pie to know that I’m supportive in her ventures…but I’m throwing in my cards.)
Bisous,
Dawn
August 27, 2012 at 11:35 pm
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