Alien vs Predator

Someone recently brought the following to my attention …

I couldn’t positively identify any of the young ladies on the top row and whilst I couldn’t actually name any of the characters on the bottom row off the top of my head, I’m pretty sure I know where they all come from without resorting to Google: Farscape, Firefly, Babylon 5, DS9, and Stargate.

Just as a point of order, I say the small cohort of sci-fi babes above does miss out at least two vitally important characters: 7 of 9 (Star Trek) and Ripley (Alien).

Now I don’t usually like to consider myself more than a low level geek, so I may not be the best person to comment on the appeal of these characters. But I played a little D&D and Traveller through my late teens & early 20s (though sadly never quite like this) and I used to know my way around machine code, so I am loosely qualified to play with my cock whilst I drool over these mega hot space babes … err … sorry … to analyse the question of why are these strong women are so alluring?

Well aside from the fact that 7 of 9 has a stunning rack, they do have one thing in common. (And for the record, I did have to look a few things up here, though mostly just names of characters etc: I’m not really an über-sci-fi-fan-boy-geek.)

  • In Farscape, Aeryn Sun engaged in battle with the Peacekeepers.
  • In Firefly, Zoe fought for the Independents’ army during the Unification War against the Alliance.
  • As a senior military officer in Babylon Five, Susan Ivanova frequently had to tackle the threat from The Shadows.
  • I think Jadzia Dax, in DS9, actually disproves my theory, as she’s a science officer. Oh well, smart is sexy too.
  • Stargate saw Col Samantha Carter at war with the Goa’uldas as they sought to rule the universe.
  • Star Trek Voyager introduced us to 7 of 9, one of the Borg, a warrior collective intent on assimilating every known life force. (And let’s face it, who wouldn’t want to be sucked in by 7 of 9?!) (Did I mention she’s got also awesome tits?)
  • And in Alien, well, Ripley had to battle the … err … the aliens.

OK, this may be stating the obvious a little, not least in the context of the poster’s strapline – I’m buying my daughter a ray gun – but I reckon men find these women sexy is because they’re fighting and they’ve got guns. As I reach for my Freudian analysis hat, I can’t help but think that there’s not much more phallic than a gun. Nor is there much that’s more manly than mortal conflict. And my theory is simple: a masculine character with a dick is attractive to men.

Of course, consideration should also be given to the top row.
If men find these women sexy, it’s largely just because they’re flaunting their bodies at us – they’re saying we’re available for sex. No rocket science there. But why do women, especially young women, seem to want to identify more with the posturing pneumatic pop princesses than the mega hot space babes with guns? The first possible reason I find slightly depressing: that they only think men want women who are overtly sexually available and that flashing your baps around is the best way to attract a mate. The second is that women are just as attracted to some soft curvaceous tits’n’arse as men are.

So what should we really draw from this poster? I’d suggest it’s not just that über-sci-fi-fan-boy-geeks have a more ethical sense of what defines a female role model, but also that everyone is just a little bit gay.

8 Responses to “Alien vs Predator”

  1. And Dr Lara Croft (pixel version)? Does an archaeologist with guns fit into your category?

  2. AM, you rule the universe. Could you write about girls without tits now? No tits no guns. 🙂


  3. I personally find women who are sexy when they’re both a little bit tough and soft. I prefer them to be like a rubber band (not too tough, not too soft). I prefer them to know when is it okay to be tough and soft!

  4. “So what should we really draw from this poster?”

    Turn off the TV.

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