Challenging times

The best part of a year ago, I embarked on my own 7 Day Celibacy Challenge (with the support of my great blog buddy, Hyacinth.) To cut a long story short, I wanted to try to go a week without wanking … but failed. Well, time goes by, and I’m in the mood for another solo sex challenge. But this one is quite different.

First, a little background.

There’s a degree to which my mind has been a lot less occupied with sex recently (more on this in another post, soon to come) and between that and a minor, but inconvenient injury to my wanking hand, my balls have been considerably less drained of late than you have come to expect, Dear Reader.

But all that changes as of tonight.

Historically, there has been little I find more relaxing at bed time than jerking off. And as I invariably wake with a boner, starting the day with a vigorous tug has always seemed the natural way to start the day. Married life, especially sexually dysfunctional married life, frequently renders this inconvenient. So when my Wife is away on business, I find I revert to old habits.

My Wife is away on business all week, which not only means I can shuffle my knuckles last thing at night and first thing in the morning with impunity, it also makes it much much easier to avail myself of the pleasures of my sex toys. Specifically my Fleshlight. One of the inconveniences of any toy like the fleshlight is the need to clean it out having fucked it. Obviously you can slip on a rubber first, which helps keep it clean, but lets be honest, bareback feels better. And as such masturbators really need to be left to air dry, leaving it out after washing has inevitable risks.

Add all these factors together, and it’s probably  pretty obvious where this is all going to end up.

Considering I’ve only cum a couple of times in the last month, and my Wife is away, it’s is the ideal opportunity to exercise my man muscle, and to properly reacquaint myself with my plastic pussy.

And here’s my challenge:

  • rectify my recent lack of masturbation
  • overcome my manual injury
  • capitalise on sleeping alone
  • and fuck my Fleshlight
  • twice a day
  • for a whole week.

There may be a couple of other toys involved too.
I’ve not banged my Fleshlight whilst enjoying a butt plug for quite a while.
Having my ball stretching weights swinging on my sack is always pleasing.
And then there’s the toy I have yet to tell you about. The really kinky toy. The one that I’ve not tried fucking with. Now the thought of that really does get me hard.

But that’s all by the by.
The core challenge is just to enjoy getting off. Regularly.

So, are you with me?

26 Responses to “Challenging times”

  1. You make it sound like Vacation! I am thinking about it but – sometimes, doing it solo makes me acutely aware that I am NOT with someone and after the mental obliteration settles, I want to and at times DO cry. Funny how it still sounds like fun! …I’m not alone so I’ll have to think for a bit.

    • Ha ha. I never said I was going to feel entirely good about it. I dare say there will be a degree of guilt, loneliness and self loathing, but hopefully most of that will get washed away by endorphins.

    • OH! I always tend to think in absolutes – a bad habit I’m slowly breaking. OK, I’m in AM! This will be interesting. Am I missing anything? Just night and morning and whatever else I want to do?

    • I wasn’t looking for anyone else to take up the challenge, but hey, why not? Just make sure you cum twice a day … and be sure to report back 😉

    • wait a minute, what does “But that’s all by the by.
      The core challenge is just to enjoy getting off. Regularly.

      So, are you with me?” mean. I thought thats what you were asking HAHA. Now I feel like a pervert!

    • You feel like a pervert?! Jeez! I’m fucking a silicone snatch and replying to you at the same time. Can you leave me too it for a few minutes, please!? Don’t worry … grunt … breathe … thrust thrust thrust … groan … it won’t take long.

    • LOLOLOL!! I feel like the pervert thrusting my shiny purple dildo into my twat as I watch your turgid plunging dance! I didn’t say pervert was a bad thing Ha!

    • HEY!! You’re starting early! Now, I better catch up!!!

    • My wife can leave me bereft for 10+ days until I reach breaking point and finally give in to a little solo time. She must be able to smell it (even though I clean up!) because its immediately thereafter that she wants to fuck. At which point she gets pissed off because I take too long (or fail) to cum. “Did you masturbate!” she says, accusingly.

    • Maybe thats her way of talking “dirty”. As a woman, she may sense the change in your body and face not any scent. Why not tell her you want her more? I know, easier said than done in marriage. Tell her No when she wants to fuck right after. make her work a little bit more. : )

    • Heh heh. I’ve told her I want more, very clearly. She wants it when she wants it, and I should be ready when she wants it – or so she thinks!

    • Say no – maybe she’ll think twice about saying no. I would wonder why if you always said yes.

    • I’ve recently stopped servicing myself and can feel my sexual readiness dwindling. I think I’m up for the challenge. Come on Nero, knowing you’re in on the action will be all the more stimulating.

    • I have (for real) just had a wank. (Thanks Anal Annie). Okay, so what’s this challenge? We just hold off as long as we can? Sound like what I do every week…

    • No silly, we masturbate twice a day. I also just finished my first session and already feel better. 😀

    • Oh I always feel better! But then I feel remorseful. Then resentful. This is not what I imagined married life would be like when I was a young teen jerking off twice daily.

    • Nero, you’ve obviously not been reading my blog for very long, so I’ll forgive you for bragging about having sex more than twice a month. Did back through my older posts. Last year saw us go 7 month without fucking, and I think we’ve had sex [… stops to think …] maybe three times this year.

    • Jayne, I do so like purple. If only you’d mentioned your dildo before I had to concentrate, I might have been able to dance to the mental image of your twat. Maybe I should muse on that tonight?

    • Betty, I’m glad to hear you’re getting back on the wagon with me. Hope you enjoy the ride as much as I am already.

  2. CaptKitty Says:

    Why limit yourself to only twice a day? I say the more the merrier.

    • That’s a very good point. However, with my Wife being away for a week, I have a whole load more chores to do without assistance and a load of work to do. Cumming more than twice every day would not make for a productive week. Add to that, with the lack of conditioning my cock has had recently, it would probably be red raw by Wednesday.

  3. I have a hillybilly fuck machine…I call her Jezabella!!
    Jezabella is my second fuck machine the first was Gretta and I broke her….I do think I have a picture of her somewhere…
    I do not get to use her a lot these days being that it is summer and my 12 is always around. The minute school is back in, I can set her on the bed and use her whenever I feel like during the day, sure makes house work a lot more fun!!
    AM whats up with the feeling of guilt and self loathing?
    You are not fucking another woman, to me that is huge….We are all human with human needs… Some of us need to have sex/masturbate and some do not have the need for sex, different strokes for different folks….
    Just my two cents..

    • I’m curious that your mechanical best friend is a girl … assuming she has a phallus.
      I agree on the needs front, but I believe negative emotions after masturbation are far from uncommon. Just ask Freud.

    • Making her a girl allows my man to feel more secure verses insecure. That and I love my man and have very little interest in other men besides the one I have. I know about Freud’s views on sex/masturbation. And back in the days when I did a lot of cocaine, just like Freud is known to have done, I would agree. As a 42 year old that does not do cocaine on a daily basis any more I would have to disagree with Freud.
      We are our worst enemy that is for sure….I have learned through my own experience that shame and self loathing are a waste of time and can hinder a person if they are not careful. So many of us get stuck in our heads and there we sit, having a pitty party and nobody will come!! Now this is from a female point of view. The way I understand it is females are way more emotional than males, there for we can get stuck in our heads longer than males. (I think, but what the fuck do I know)
      Life is to short to be anything but happy.

  4. […] I read a post by the wonderfully horny Accidental Masturbator.  His inspiring post on wait for it…masturbation, pulled me out of my dry spell […]

  5. […] a long dry spell? Yes, I think I have!!) Bettyhomebanger has implored suggested I join her on the Accidental Masturbator’s latest quest. I think it will be the only thing that keeps me […]

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