You said what …?

Sometimes you have a conversation that is all very predictable.
And then it doesn’t quite go where you expect.
And by the time you have an opportunity to think about what has just been said, it’s too late to ask Did you just say what I think you said?
That just happened with a conversation between my Wife and me.

It was all very light hearted, and I’m not sure how easily the joking tone will translate to text, but this is pretty much exactly how that conversation went:

Her : Do you think it’s too soon to put the heating on?
(She wasn’t entirely serious, knows perfectly well She doesn’t need my permission, and doesn’t really expect me to say yes.)
Me : Probably. It’s been pretty warm until today.
(I could so easily have said no, it has been quite cold, but it was obvious I was playing the game.)
Her : I know. I could put a sweater on.
(Mock guilt.)
Me : Yeah. I did this morning. Just after I realised I had cold feet.
(Just joining in the joke.)
Her : And sometimes it’s still warm in October.
(Conciliatory optimism.)
Me : Yeah, in you’re in the south of France.
(Sure, I’m being a little sarcastic, but it’s not malicious and we both know it.)
Her : I’ve been on a British beach in October a t-shirt.
(We both know that’s the exception, not the rule, when it comes to a British October.)
Me : I’ve been in up a British mountain in snow in October in a t-shirt.
(I was young and fit back then.)

Her : Hmmm …
(Humouring me.)
Me : And there are people naked on the beach in Brighton in November.
(We both know Brighton nudists are a notorious enthusiastic and hardy bunch.)
Her : True, but not me.
(Well obviously! Firstly my Wife is not a fan of the cold. Secondly She’d never go to a nudist beach.)
Me : Yeah, you’re right!
(Ok, this was a slightly mocking comment, and in a slightly mocking tone. As said, there’s no way She’d ever go to a nudist beach.)
Her : It’s happened …
(It’s almost a dismissive retort … and she walks out of the room and heads straight upstairs.)

I’m sorry? What did She just say? Did She just suggest She’s been to a nudist beach?
No no no no.

Did She just suggest She’s got her kit off in public?
There’s been some mistake.

I know She used to hang out with some pretty bohemian, gay friends in Brighton from time to time, but … err …
Not in my universe.

MY WIFE? Completely in the buff out doors?
I know she’s been topless, but surely She doesn’t mean that.

MY WIFE? Naked in front of friends?
But suppose she did mean that, how come I don’t know?

MY WIFE Getting Her tits out and baring her bush in public?
Brighton Beach’s nudists have been joked about in the past: how come She didn’t fess up before. Why just this tiny morsel of tantalising information?
I’m kind of lost for words. And She’s upstairs by now … and buried deep in parental duties already … and there’s no real way to follow it up … and … err … [scratches head and looks puzzled]

2 Responses to “You said what …?”

  1. Having just moved to London, you’re tempting me to take a trip to Brighton…

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