I know it’s late, butt …

Dear Santa

I know it’s too late for Xmas day, but … well … oh how to explain … let me start at the beginning.

I was horny this morning. Really horny. Really really horny. But I’m saving myself. Our new need for condoms, and their horrors has meant I’ve had to leave my cock alone for what feels an eternity if I’m to have any chance of cumming in one. And whilst I’m not pissed off about it, last night didn’t help.

We were straight into foreplay as soon as we were both in bed, but She couldn’t get Her head in the right place and started concentrating on giving me a hand-job. Which felt good. Very good. Having had my cock and balls waxed smooth just before the holidays, Her touch was amplified and exquisit. And I nearly let Her stroke till Her hands got sticky. But you know as well as I do, Santa, that a cock in the hand isn’t as good as one in the bush. I wanted to fuck Her. And it wasn’t going to happen. So I stopped Her, moved Her hand to cup my balls, with Her thumb and forefinger circled around the base of my shaft, and asked Her just to hold my junk like that. Because it just feels nice. And that’s how I fell asleep – with my Wife cradling my nuts.

This morning, Dear Santa, I woke up horny. Really horny. And really early. I vainly put a hand on Her hip. She was so deeply asleep She didn’t even stir when my fingers brushed through Her thatch. No! I had to stop. I got out of bed and went downstairs for a cup of tea. Normally, as you well know, Santa, it would have been a cup of tea, some porn and a wank. But as mentioned, I want to have a chance of cumming in a condom, so  it was just tea, porn and self control.

You always seem to be wearing gloves, Santa, so I’m guessing you might share my fetish, and appreciate that gloved hand-jobs was where I started this morning.


Amidst those I found a lovely scene of a guy getting pegged by a laughing, latex clad redhead.


That got me looking at pegging pictures, and though I wasn’t looking for such, a shot of a DP.


The thing that caught my attention about this, was the way the guys’ balls were swinging. Well, Santa, you know how much I like wearing ball stretchers, and how much I’d love my own jewels to hand lower … Obviously that got me looking at pictures with swinging balls.


Just as with this picture, a lot of what turned up was gay porn. Which somewhat inevitably was predominantly anal. Which lead me on to butt plugs.
Which is how I stumbled across this image.


If you check your records, Santa,you’ll see I’ve had an Aneros prostate massager on my Xmas list for several years. I would have bought one myself, but the price is a little high. I hadn’t really paid much attention to the arsehole violators from Nexus. Until I discovered this. The Nexus Revo 2. It’s £120, which is a very long way from cheap. But come on, Santa! Look at it. Just imagine that beauty stuffed up your rectum and wriggling around against your prostate. Tell me you don’t want one too.

So please, Santa. I know it’s too late to get one of these under my Xmas tree for 2014 (actually that’s probably just as well as a considerable number of my family, and my Wife’s family were round for Xmas and unwrapping a prostate massager might have been a little awkward) but please please please can you get me one of these? I know you know who’s been good and bad this year, and I know you know I’ve been bad. Very bad.

Please, Santa?

All the best,

9 Responses to “I know it’s late, butt …”

  1. Hope you get your wish, and let us know how good it really is 🙂
    Also hope you got to come in a condom, or will get to soon!

    • Have spent far too many stollen monents today reading and watching reviews if the Revo.
      I’ve also been looking into anonymous crowd funding. 😉

      As for filling a condom … I think I’ve got 5 days if jizz waiting to test its capacity, and my abilty to sense a pussy. I WILL be going to bed with a very obvious boner tonight. 🙂

    • I just read a comment saying you got to unload last night… I’m happy for you 🙂

    • (This morning, actually.)
      I got to unload quite a lot: two substantial volleys that landed past my head on the pillow, a couple more on my chest, more cum than I’ve had the pleasure of seeing dripping from Her hand, and still more covering my balls. I don’t think I’ve unloaded quite so much in ages. But I guess it was nearly a week’s worth of build up so nit surprising.
      We also talked a bit … which felt almost as good.

    • Oh AM, I’m SOOO happy for you! About the good sex and the talk. 🙂
      (and wouldn’t mind a visual on those two volleys that landed past your head, those that landed on your chest and so on…). Though I guess this is not happening any time soon (the pictures I mean).

    • Ha ha. At best it’s going to take a while for my balks to get that full again.
      I’ve actually tried to film a money shot a couple of times for AMPC, but it’s turned out to be suprisingly difficult. Maybe that should be my task for 2015?

    • You could always ask your wife to take the shot 😉

    • A camera in the bedroom is possibly a bit advanced at the moment. I think She’d be more likely to let me shoot on Her tits … and I dont see that happening any time soon. Small steps. Small steps.

    • Yes, small steps! The most important being that steps forward are taken! 🙂

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