Something ventured. Nothing gained.

It hadn’t been my finest afternoon when it came to parenting. Indiscipline and rudeness had ruffled my feathers, I’d ended up shouting. My Wife had am tried to negotiate a truce, but ended up getting sucked in and resorting to similarly negative tactics. We all ended up pissed off.

Not a moment for anything sexy. But then again …
I went upstairs to my bedside table, fetched out a pale pink envelope and returned downstairs to give it to my Wife.

Me: Considering I’ve messed up the afternoon, I figure I can’t make it much worse.
Her: What’s this?
Me: You know the lingerie I gave you last Xmas?
Her: Yes.
Me: Well I couldn’t take it back. They’d just give me vouchers instead.
Her: Is this the place in Townsville?
Me: Yes. Going past it yesterday reminded me.
Her: Ah. Yes.
Me: And you said you wear lingerie because I like it. And we seem to be doing a bit better at the moment.
Her: Ok.
She opened the envelope and silently thumbed through the vouchers, with boner inducing pictures of underwear models.
Me: You don’t have to spend them if you don’t want to, but you can if you do. Or I can spend them fir you.
Her: I think I’d rather spend them myself.
She hesitated, and it seemed She was trying to find the right words.
Me: We don’t have to talk about it now. It just seemed like it couldn’t make the afternoon any worse.
Her: It’s ok.
And She put the envelope down on the floor.
There was a thump from upstairs.
Me: Should I put those somewhere they won’t get mistaken for a Xmas card?
Her: Probably a good idea.
I took the upstairs and put them on Her pillow. When I came downstairs again …
Me: I didn’t mean we can’t talk about it now if you want to.
Her: No. It’s fine. Maybe later.

For reasons not unrelated to those that caused the first stresses of the afternoon, it didn’t really get any better. Everyone got pissed off at each other again and the house was full of people who weren’t really in the others. I saw no reason to tempt me and my Wife back into turbulent waters, so I went back upstairs to move the pink envelope to somewhere where it wouldn’t be noticed. In the unlikely event She actually wants it, wants to do something with it, buy something sexy for Herself or, perish the thought, for me, then In sure She will raise the subject Herself.

5 Responses to “Something ventured. Nothing gained.”

  1. Whew — troubled waters. Sounds like a day you just want to write off.

  2. Sounds like it juat wasnt yhe right time to get into a sexy mood. I hope she decides to use them though. I’d love to get gift cards for lingerie.

    • Sadly not just not the right time. This runs far deeper than that. But more of that in the next thrilling installment of …
      It’s funny you say you’d love such a gift – when I tried to return the blue underwear to Luxurios Designer Lingerie Emporium, the sales assistant said “If it’s any consolation, there are plenty of women who would love to have been given these.”

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