Bad ideas – 3 : Pandora’s case

In case you thought my plotting attempts to passively engage my Wife in conversation about celibacy (or indeed any remedial options) were limited to duplicitous provocations with underwear and laundry, remember there is no shortage of perversions I could allow my Wife stumble upon.

There’s the selection of porn (both print and video), vintage porn (again both print and video), fetish specific books and magazines, male masturbation toys, a butt plug, a pair of luscious purple suede handcuffs, a strapless strap-on, an incongruous epilator, penis plugs, a chastity cage, several ornaments you’d definitely take off the livingroom shelf when Aunty Nelly came for tea, ball stretchers, lace manties, the selection of thongs and G-strings that used to be poorly secreted at the back of your regular underwear drawer, leather briefs and of course a whole selection of latex fetishwear … I’m certain I’ve not listed everything, Dear Reader … and all this (or rather most of this) now resides in an old suitcase under My bed.

It’s not locked, although I do have keys for it.
And it’s barely hidden, although it possibly should be.
Or perhaps it shouldn’t be.
Perhaps it should be left out on my bed one day. Not that that would in itself guarantee curiosity would get the better of my Wife – My bedroom is in the converted roof space and really it is only me that ever ascends the second flight of stairs.
But suppose She was to stumble upon an unlocked case that really should have been secreted away.
Suppose one of the clasps were accidentally left open.

I don’t suppose curiosity would get the better of Her.
And more to the point, even if it did, I’d be astounded if She broached the subject of a case full of objet de perv.
You’re right, Wise Reader. It’s a bad idea.

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