As I showered the other morning, I found myself musing over how, maybe 8 or 9 months ago, I’d felt uncomfortable with my arm around my Wife, and how that had received cursory discussion with Kirsty (our last counsellor). My discomfort at the potentially proprietorial overtones was mentioned, but not that I was uneasy making

even non-sexual contact with my Wife’s tits. I suspect that, had I related that, my discomfort would have been echoed by my Wife’s dislike of the word Tits.

I’m sure She’s not the only person with such an aversion. Hell … how many people recoil at the word Moist and I grew up in a house where anything even remotely sexual was only ever mentioned in medical terms.

From the word Tits, my mind spiralled down to Pussy, and contemplated its connotations. Synonyms may describe exactly the same thing, whilst conveying disparate subtexts. This is supremely exemplified by Cunt vs Vulva. As I though through the various terms for female genital, it struck me that each respective noun has quite a different message.

Vagina or Vulva is either medical, or used by someone not wholly at one with their Down There.
Pussy is something you actually like and enjoy. And definitely if it is your own.
Muff is typically hairsuit, as is Beaver.
Lady Garden is something not being taken seriously, and is probably drunk.
Quim is playful and more likely fingered than fucked.
Fanny(uk) is behind the school bikesheds and quite possibly spread across the centre spread of magazines being passed between teenagers. [Ed: Magazines? AM is certainly showing his age here. What self respecting teenager doesn’t get their hardcore porn on their smartphone these days? Magazines? I ask you?!]
Twats and Snatches are counted by notches on adolescent bed posts, and slaps on the back as def is regaled in the pub.
And Minge probably carries an STI.
Cunt, however, is something special Visceral. It is simply glorious. Something dripping with passion and primal urges. Wanton and hedonistic. Something of power and desire and which is utterly compelling. Something to be worshipped.

One Response to “Synonymous”

  1. Words are given whatever power you allow them to have. The word Cunt can repulse and/or excite, depending on the delivery and the recipient. I happen to like the word because I have given it an erotic meaning for me.

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