Archive for the Meet the Masturbator Category

100 ways

Posted in Meet the Masturbator with tags , on September 21, 2018 by Accidental Masturbator

Not all of this song applies. Not the verses anyway. There are no dark, survived histories, but some of it chimes with me today. Deafeningly so. So … Continue reading

A funny thing happened away from the forum

Posted in Meet the Masturbator with tags , on August 4, 2018 by Accidental Masturbator

Around a month ago, I resolved to take a break from the online world. I logged out of all of my social media accounts (narcissistically informing all my followers/friends/stalkers/trolls about my impending absence) and signing off on blogging (in a similarly narcissistic manner).

A week or two prior to that I’d also stopped wanking.
Ok, I confess, as shocking as that revelation might be to you, Loyal Reader, it’s Continue reading

It’s not my problem

Posted in Meet the Masturbator, Porn with tags , , , , , on July 31, 2018 by Accidental Masturbator

[This post was started around two months ago, prior to my elective absence. The fact that it is being published now, along with its subsequent companion post, does not necessarily mark my return to regular blogging, but rather may provide some background to a subsequent post.]

As I walked into the kitchen, the breakfast radio presenter was discussing how addiction to computer gaming has recently been recognised by the World Health Organisation as a medical condition, thus opening the possibility (in the UK) of gaming addicts benefiting from treatment on the NHS.

I’ve never really had much interest in computer gaming; as I’ve never owned a console, the closest I’ve got to Continue reading

Neither the time nor the place

Posted in Meet the Masturbator with tags , on September 5, 2017 by Accidental Masturbator

It wasn’t my bed.
It wasn’t the time of night to be awake.
It wasn’t an ordinary erection.

It was the sort of boner that Continue reading

Maybe it’s me?

Posted in Fixing a broken marriage, Meet the Masturbator with tags , , on April 21, 2017 by Accidental Masturbator

Maybe it’s me?
Maybe I’m the problem?
Maybe our failure to have a normal sex life is my fault?
Maybe I’m just insatiable?
For about two decades it was a Continue reading

Not even one

Posted in Meet the Masturbator with tags on February 24, 2017 by Accidental Masturbator

… and then there are days which start with an erection that feels like it’s been reinforced with steel, and Continue reading

Guilt free

Posted in Meet the Masturbator with tags , , , , on January 7, 2017 by Accidental Masturbator

I turned out of our road and headed for town. She was 30yds ahead of me, but even at that distance she caught my attention. I picked up my pace to catch up with her. I had no intention of speaking to her, or engaging with her in any way whatsoever, nor did I have anything remotely nefarious in mind. She was just … what was it about her?

At about 5’4″ with dark hair pulled up into a pony tail, she was Continue reading

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