Archive for Sex therapy

I should be more careful

Posted in Random stuff about sex with tags , , , , on March 9, 2018 by Accidental Masturbator

Privacy is important, especially for pervy stuff. I like to think I’m careful with what windows I leave open on my computer and that my account passwords are reasonably secure, especially those I use regularly on my smartphone. And just because I’m proud pervert, some of my passwords are a bit pervy. eg For several years my phone was locked with Continue reading

My what?!

Posted in Fixing a broken marriage, Sex therapy with tags , , , , , , on February 3, 2018 by Accidental Masturbator

I’m fucking angry.
And I fucking hurt.
It’s less than an hour since we walked out of our third therapy session. And I’m fucking angry. And hurt. And frustrated.

Going into the safe space of the counselling room, after the previous few days, I felt no inclination to contribute. Fuck it. Let someone else do the work for a change.

Sue (our therapist) seemed stuck. She looked to me to start. I wasn’t starting.
My Wife looked to me. I still wasn’t starting.
Fuck. Apparently no-one else could start.
Sue was being paid to run the room. Let her fucking hold the conch.

I can’t remember where the conversation finally started.
I can’t remember much about the arc of the narrative.
In response to something that was said, Sue steered us back to Continue reading

Homework

Posted in Fixing a broken marriage, Sex therapy with tags , , , , , on December 27, 2017 by Accidental Masturbator

At the end of our first therapy session We were sent away with 3 bits of homework.

  1. Say something positive and affirming to each other once each day.
  2. Try a 5 Languages of Love online quiz, because usually people give what they want to get back, and it’s useful to understand how we communicate affection.
  3. And to write three lists of threes:
    • 3 things we want to keep
    • 3 things we want to discard
    • 3 things we want to introduce

We conspicuously Continue reading

Here We go again

Posted in Fixing a broken marriage, Sex therapy with tags , , , , , , , , on December 21, 2017 by Accidental Masturbator

Six years. Would you believe it, Dear Reader? Last week represented six years since I started this blog. Having looked back at how it has told the story of much of Our Dysfunction, I’m surprised.
On the one hand, it was when I resolved to try to resucitate our flagging sex life, though I don’t really remember what had led up to that in any detail.
It was also when my Wife willingly accepted The Infamous Red Lingerie for Xmas.
And possibly most significantly, it was only a couple of months before we first visited a marriage counsellor.
I honestly can’t get my head around how these things fitted together in such a short period of time.

And here we are again. At our first session with a counsellor. Albeit one that comes from a sex therapy angle.

Sex is Continue reading

Pointless exercise

Posted in Fixing a broken marriage, Sex therapy with tags , , , , on December 7, 2017 by Accidental Masturbator

She’s spoken to the counsellors.
Couples are usually seen together. (As I had already understood.)
There is the opportunity for the individuals to speak to a counsellor separately, but for ethical reasons that would be a different counsellor to the one the couple would see together. So as to maintain a balanced discussion.

Well fuck it then.
There’s no Continue reading

Stumbling and struggling

Posted in Fixing a broken marriage, Sex therapy with tags , , , on November 16, 2017 by Accidental Masturbator

Me: I did some reading on self-help and had another look at the links on the sex therapy clinic’s website.  I struggled to find much of use.

The best suggestion I found was Continue reading

Never talk to strangers 

Posted in Fixing a broken marriage, Sex therapy with tags , on November 14, 2017 by Accidental Masturbator

She has said before, at least once, probably more than once, that She doesn’t think She could talk to a stranger about sex.

How is it that She can accept an Continue reading

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