It’s nothing

Posted in Fixing a broken marriage with tags , , on November 17, 2016 by Accidental Masturbator

[What follows wasn’t nearly as angry as it sounds.Read it with a smile, and try not to judge.]
7am. I’ve been at my desk for an hour, and awake far longer. The alarm clock wakes Her and She sticks Her head round the door on Her way to the shower.
Her: Morning.
Me: Morning.
Her: How are you doing?
Me: Crap. I don’t think I slept for more than half an hour at a stretch.
My inner monologue: I could be less honest. Less winging. But I know sex would make a difference to my ability to sleep, as well as Continue reading

Randy Old Yanking Gimp Boy Injects Vagina

Posted in Fetishwear on November 11, 2016 by Accidental Masturbator

It’s finished.
My design project.
You remember, Loyal Reader? I’ve mentioned it more than once.
Matching Continue reading

The temptation of others

Posted in Fixing a broken marriage with tags , on November 7, 2016 by Accidental Masturbator

We had supper at a friends’ house. All our respective kids were tucked up and asleep upstairs. After the dinner plates were cleared we chatted around the kitchen table. The usual topics for middle-aged middle-class couples: jobs, holidays, politics Continue reading


Posted in Meet the Masturbator with tags , on November 5, 2016 by Accidental Masturbator

I’m horny all the time.
I’ve not had a fuck in 10 months.
There’s little sign of either changing.
C’est la vie!
So I’ve been reflecting on sex – what I like, why I like it, how important it is to me. And it got me thinking about where it all started. When did I become interested in sex? What were the triggers? What effect did it have? What were the formative steps on my road to being the enthusiast I am today?

What follows really just started out as a bit of an intellectual exercise, and having written it down, read it, re-read it, and mused on it for a few days, I’m not even sure what it reveals, if anything, other than I’ve bought a lot of porn, and spent a lot of time jerking off. But you knwew that, Dear Reader, didn’t you.
Anyway, here it is Continue reading

On average

Posted in Fixing a broken marriage with tags on November 3, 2016 by Accidental Masturbator

On 30thNov I received an email. The sender was making light of my situation, but I can easily forgive them that because they were right on the nail … and it was funny.
They sent me this meme which had reminded them of me: Continue reading

Mixed messages

Posted in Random stuff about sex on October 31, 2016 by Accidental Masturbator

Amidst my current peak in sexual frustration I’ve been doing some half hearted research on how to rein in my sex drive. Shooting my load in an obliging pussy would be one perfunctory treatment, but what about dealing with the cause? The obvious way to lower male libido is to lower testosterone. Right? Well … Continue reading

You can put a finger on it

Posted in Random stuff about sex on October 28, 2016 by Accidental Masturbator

… and after the drop-to-your-knees-and-rub-till-your-raw gorgeousness of yesterday, the other picture I wanted to share was this … Continue reading

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